What psychological problems does a mess in the house indicate?

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Order or chaos in life is a kind of mirror of what is happening inside you: with your thoughts, desires, goals and emotions. Therefore, if you want positive changes, you should carry out a general cleaning both in the apartment and in your own head.

Understand what internal problems the space signals, pouring down on you in a chaotic flow of information, things and events.

It may seem that the house is just a space for relaxation, so if there is a mess in it, then it’s okay, other areas of life look like isolated examples of success and growth. Only there is also confusion: work has not been pleasing for a long time, you communicate with those who are not interesting to you, money is always lacking, a bright future does not come. All this speaks of a person’s habit of surrounding himself with chaos and disorder. He is so used to it, he is “normal”, sometimes he even likes it. Of course, such a choice – to live in an environment of chaos – he made for a reason, but for certain reasons.

Fear of change

If we exclude the clinical and psychiatric component, then the first thing that such a lifestyle speaks of is the fear of novelty in a person. Littering up space in this case is a kind of attempt to stop time, to create an illusion of security. Burrowing in a mass of unnecessary things, attitudes and attitudes, a person thus deprives himself of the opportunity to face something new, freely moving, alive. He clings to the past, in everyday life, “ties” himself to old things (even if it is unnecessary rubbish), simply because their energy is already familiar to him. And to let something new into your own life is, firstly, scary, and secondly, difficult. First, you have to clean up the rubble of accumulated “junk”, and this is efforts on yourself, the cost of your own emotions, time and energy. It’s not easy, in general. And again, running in a circle begins in an atmosphere of a familiar routine, and changes are shifted to the next month or year.

The point is that decluttering is essential for real life change. It is not for nothing that all reboot courses begin with the recommendation to “free up space and make room for something new.” In the mess there is no place for the “new”, but there is an understandable “old”, among which, perhaps, uncomfortable, but understandable and predictable. And do not indulge yourself with the thought that this is the desired stability. It is much more effective to admit to yourself that the disorder is your response, that protective shell, which you hide behind the fear of change. Try not to lie to yourself: and after honesty will come a clear understanding of your needs, and you will be able to allow yourself the desired changes.

Draw the border

Chaotically scattered things – this is also a story about personal boundaries. Thus, a person tries to remind himself and others that he exists and is something of himself. “At least I created this chaos,” – such an explanation for oneself in this situation would be quite logical.

Clutter in the home and in life is also a form of protest: against rigid parental rules or partner restrictions. “This is my space and it will be as I decided, and not as my parents demanded.” If a person has long stepped over the age of majority and does not live with his parents, the craving for littering may be a consequence of being “stuck” in adolescence, when the protest was not expressed and still requires an exit. Driven inside, such rebellion can be expressed in slovenliness in everyday life, disorder in the apartment and, as a result, lead to conflicts in a couple.

Whichever of the reasons is the root of the problem, in any case, the habit of living in a mess always highlights the presence of certain psychological deformations. Dealing with and working with the latter is necessary if you want to make your life more pleasant and harmonious.

Anyone who is tired of domestic disorder, apathy and laziness, as well as those who want to get rid of the mess in their home and life once and for all – find a therapist online.

Category: Online psychotherapy, Psychotherapy tips


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I’ve hurt myself while trying to help myself more than you can imagine, that’s why I want to scientifically analyze every popular self-help technique and ‘method’ there is.